Chapter 1- Kids will be kids

Friendship is like peeing on yourself everyone can see it but only you get the warm feeling it brings

Author unknown

Chapter 1


Burmington Cove was a quaint little town. Beautiful really. It was broke up in three sections, the old side of town, the new side and the less fortunate side or as the residents called it the poor side. The old side of town was absolutely beautiful all the streets were lined with maple trees and every house had one willow tree growing in front. People from all around would come to take pictures of the streets especially in the fall, they were breath taking. History says 50 years ago the town got together and planted the maple trees and for their hard work the mayor gave everyone a willow tree for a thank you. They all agreed to plant them on their front lawns for show.

The new side of town was full of huge homes, town houses, apartments and condos. Everything was new. When you drove through there it even smelled new. They were beautifully made but it was just no comparison to the old side of town. Then there was the less fortunate side. It had potential but the mayor poured all the money in the town to develop the new side there was no money left. Sure if an investor came along he could make a fortune, but no luck as of yet. It was full of abandoned boarded up buildings. Nobody liked driving on that side because the road was so poor that they were scared it would damage their cars.

All in all the town was very homey. It was just one of those places that you see in picture books. The reason the new side was built was one simple fact. Once people moved there nobody wanted to leave. Its history was built by these generations and generations of families. Everything you needed was in walking distance stores, doctors’ office, schools, you name it. It was described as being a model town on many occasions.

Today was a special day for many boys and girls in this town. It was the first day of school. There was one little girl in particular that was especially excited, this was Stacy Wright. She was a pretty little thing. Thick brown hair and beautiful big brown eyes. She was much a tomboy, loved her jeans, t-shirts and hoodies. Burmington Cove Elementary was just a flurry of activity. Little Stacy had butterflies in her stomach. Never could she remember seeing so many kids at once. She wished that her mom or dad had taken the day off work to drive her to school like most of the other parents did. She followed the others to her class room and sat at a desk while all the other kids stood next to their parents with the deer in the headlight look. There was only one girl that came over to her, “Can I sit next to you?” said little Marissa Melborn. Stacy looked at her; she too was very pretty the same brown but curly hair and the deepest blue eyes you could imagine. Stacy wanted to say “yes please do” but she was much too shy. Marissa sat down anyway. “Your parents didn’t come either huh?” Said the pretty little girl. Stacy finally mustered up the courage to talk.

“Nope” she said.

“Mine neither… Do you want to be my friend?” Stacy looks at the girl with amazement and finally smiled.

“Yes… Yes I would!” The rest of that day the two were inseparable.

Marissa and her dad lived in an apartment in the new side of town. It wasn’t big but it was nice. It was home to her. Marissa too was obviously a tomboy just like Stacy. Could it be because it was just her and her dad? Marissa’s mom past away in a car accident a few years ago and last year Marissa’s dad decided they needed a fresh start so they moved to Burmington Cove. Stacy got off the bus and ran into the house. Stacy’s family lived in the new side of town as well, she loved her home.

“Mom…mom guess what!!” Stacy’s mom was cooking supper and said,

“Not now Stacy I’m trying to cook supper, tell me when I’m done.”

Stacy looked up and said “but Mom!”,

“Stacy please! If you could just set the table that would be great we’ll talk later!”

“Yes Mom” Stacy said sadly as she got out the silverware.

“And make sure you put the silverware in the right spots tonight.” Her mother nagged. Stacy did as she was told.

“Mom!…Mom…” Oh great… my brother is home Stacy thought. Stacy didn’t like her brother he was three years older than her and was always bugging her and beating her up.

“MOM!!!” she heard again. “Get out of my way squirt” said the chubby brown haired boy as he pushed her out of the way.

“MOM! Are you going to answer me or what!”,

“What Matthew I’m busy!”

“I don’t care… guess what happened today!” He burst out.

“What Matthew?”

“My gym teacher told me that I would make a good wrestler, I want to join wrestling!” “No Matthew, not this year you’re too young.”

“I’m not too young Mom, wrestling starts for kids seven and up… I’m seven and up, Mom… Please!”

“ Talk to your father when he gets home I’m busy, now help your sister set the table.” “I’m not helping that soggy little French fry!” he snapped.

“Do as your told Matthew or you defiantly won‘t be joining wrestling!” his mother snapped back.

“Fine… Oh wait I got homework to do I’ll go do that, that’s more important… right Mom?”

“Whatever Matthew just leave me be so I can get this supper cooked”

Stacy watched it all unfold. Her brother always got what he wanted and was so demanding. She on the other hand didn’t want to be a bother to anyone and didn’t like getting in trouble so she just did as she was told.

“Stacy!” Stacy blinked

“Come back to earth child I‘ve said your name three times!” “Sorry Mom”

“Did you set the table?”


“You know what… it’s a nice day let’s eat supper on the patio” her Mother said.

“But Mom I just got the table set in here” Stacy said with a sigh.

“Well, now you can set it outside”. Her Mother demanded.

“Yes Mom.” Stacy was setting the patio table outside when she heard the roar of her father’s truck come in the yard, followed by the pound of her brothers’ foot steps down the stairs. Matthew flung the front door opened and yelled “Dad!… Dad!”

Stacy was sure the whole neighborhood heard him.

“What do you want Matthew”. His father said with a groan.

“Guess what!!!… My gym teacher said that I’d be perfect for wrestling, can I please join…PLEASE!” Matthew stood with his hands in prayer position.

“Look Matt buddy I’m sorry but money’s a little tight right now” his father said regretfully.

“Awe come on Dad, it doesn’t cost that much all I need is $50 by next Monday, you can swing that can’t you?” His father stood and looked into his boys face and knew he just couldn’t disappoint him.

“Ok Matt I’ll figure out a way to get you the $50”.

“YES! Awe thanks Dad you’re the best!” And with that Matt bolted back upstairs. Again Stacy watched it all unfold.

“Dad” Stacy said. “Not now Stacy just let me get settled in before I get bombarded by you too.” Stacy put her head down “ok”. She went back to setting the table for the second time. She could hear her brother through his bedroom window when she was outside. He was on the phone telling his friends,

“Oh yeah I suckered them into letting me join, I knew they would”.

Stacy frowned and walked back into the house. The Wright family sat out on their patio enjoying their supper… well Matt enjoyed it, he never shut up. Every time Stacy would try to talk he’d say, “ Would you wait… I’m not done”. Finally she just gave up hoping that they would remember that it was her first day of school and ask her how it went. All she wanted to do was tell them about Marissa, her new best friend, she liked the sound of that… best friend.

“Matt would you just stop talking for a few minutes, Stacy has been trying to tell us something ever since she got home” Their Mother said. “Go ahead dear”

Stacy look up with hope in her eyes, finally. “I met a girl today her name is Marissa were best friends.”

Her brother sat there with his mouth open and contents pouring out and finally said “That was your big news?! You have a friend OOOO good for you.”

“Matthew” his Mother scolded. She turned to her daughter. “That’s great honey”.

Stacy smiled. After supper was over their mother announced,

“Matt you can put the dishes in the dishwasher since you didn’t help set the table”.

“I was doing homework” He snarled. “And I’m not done”.

Stacy wanted so desperately to tell her parents that he was actually bragging to his friends that he suckered them in, but didn’t want to get beat up.

“You have all night for homework, you’re not getting out of it this time”, said his Mom.

“If you want the $50 for wrestling you’d better start helping out around the house more often or the deal is off, understand?” His father pushed.

Matt groaned “ok”. Then stomped off. Stacy cleared her dishes off the table, went to her room and lay down on her bed. A best friend she thought. I can’t wait to go to school tomorrow. She was so excited that she laid out her clothes and organized her school books then danced around her room. She was so happy thinking about her day she forgot how her parents weren’t really interested in her life like they were her brothers.

“What are you doing?” Little did she know that Matt was watching her the whole time?

Stacy stopped dancing and stared at her brother wondering what he wanted. “nnnothing” she stammered.

“You’re dancing around your room like an idiot” he laughed.

“Get out” she cried, mad that he made her feel like a fool.

“No, maybe I’ll tell your new best friend that you’re an idiot” He laughed again.

Stacy started crying. He didn’t know what it meant to her, she couldn’t have him take it away.

“I’m out of here my job is done”. And he walked away laughing and mocking her dance moves. A few minutes later Stacy’s mom came in.

“What’s the matter honey” she asked concerned.

“Matt said he’s going to tell Marissa that I’m an idiot so she won’t be my friend anymore” she was crying so hard that she almost couldn’t get it out.

“Oh honey, I’ll talk to him, don’t worry. Other than right now, did you have a good
day?” Stacy looked up at her Mom and wiped her eyes. She wants to know how my day was…my day? Stacy smiled. She loved it when her mom came into her room to talk; she wished it happened more often. She and mom sat on her bed for the next hour just talking.


Stacy’s mom looked at her,“That’s my queue …What Matt” she said as she walked out of Stacy’s room. Boy she really hated her brother. He was always interrupting the special moments.

Stacy got up at dawn, rolled over 5:30. She laid there looking up at the ceiling wondering how her day would go. She managed to stay in bed until 6:30 then got up to get ready for school. This happened every day for a month. Especially when she got best friend number two, Katherine Meek. Once she got settled into school her mom or dad had to start waking her up.

All year the trio was inseparable. But even at a young age Stacy and Marissa knew that Katherine wasn’t quite the same as them. Katherine was a little blond that lived in the old side of town. She liked to wear pretty dresses and shoes every day to school. She hated recess because she was scared to get dirty. Her hair was always done in flawless hair styles and her nails were always done perfectly. Meanwhile Stacy and Marissa stuck to jeans and T-shirts. They always threw their hair in ponytails and wore worn out sneakers, very much tom boys. Katherine didn’t have the same looks either. Katherine was pudgy and really not very pretty while the other two were sure to be knockouts when they got older. Many times Katherine would try to let her do them up at sleepovers, they would once and a while to entertain Katherine but the girls were never really into it. But they did like Katherine for she was a spitfire she said what was
on her mind and never stopped scheming. While the other two were more shy. Katherine always said to them “Stand up for yourselves I won’t be around forever to do it for you.” Stacy and Marissa’s parents weren’t very fond of Katherine just for that fact, but the girls didn’t care. They liked her and that’s all that mattered to them.

Many weekends the girls would take turns staying at each other’s houses. In the summertime they pretty much lived at Katherine’s because she had a tree house that was built in the old maple tree. The girls shared so many secrets there, good ones, bad ones, juicy ones and boring ones. They decorated the tree house like a mini house. They all loved that tree house. They would climb up the ladder through a door in the floor, which they could lock, it had two windows, and each girl had their own wall that they decorated themselves with posters of the current fade. On the last wall they carved their names into it and painted their hands and put their hand prints together on it. They vowed to do this every year. Outside the tree house was three swings which people couldn‘t really see them for all the branches. Many nights they would swing and talk and laugh. It was really their own world. They always dreaded when they would hear “Look guys there’s my stupid sister and her stupid friends”. Matt, Stacy’s brother and his friends, would taunt and torcher them. Most of the times when they were bored is when they would come around for some “entertainment” as they would call it. Katherine would fight and fight with them, she always stood the ground for the trio but the other two weren’t far behind her.

“We must do something to them to make them never come around here again” Katherine said with a huff.

“What?” the other two said in choruses.

“I don’t know but it has to be good”.

“We’re six they’re nine what can we do to them, plus you might get dirty?” Marissa said.

“I don’t know, we need to think and it‘ll be worth it if I get dirty.” Said a determined Katherine.

“You get the double whammy Stacy, you have your brother and his best friend Gunner MacLean who bugs you just as bad, the rest just laugh at them but don‘t really say much.” sighed Marissa

“Yeah and he stays over at my house all the time, they never leave me alone”. Complained Stacy.

The girls sat for hours planning. The next day they got up early and got their plan together.

“Ok” Katherine said. “You guys know what to do”.

“Yes” they chorused.

“Ok get in position”.

Their plan was, Stacy was to go up in the tree house so the boys could see her just because they loved to bug her the most. Katherine and Marissa had a rope on either side of the road and when they drove by they were going to “clothesline” them. Matt and Gunner always lead the pack so they knew they‘d get their targets.

“I hear them coming! Be quite… well not you Stacy” Katherine panicked.

Stacy looked out the tree house window.

“Awe what’s wrong little sis your best friends desert you?” said Matt

“‘Bout time they grew some brains, who would hang out with the likes of you” said Gunner.

“Shut up you guys” Stacy cried. She then started to cry, a fake cry of course really she was getting Katherine’s camera ready. Oh yes they wanted proof those boys are babies.
The girls watched the boys bike up to them yelled, “NOW!” and up the rope went Matt and Gunner went flying off the back of their bikes.

“What the hell? You little brats!” yelled Matt.

“RUN!” they yelled. The girls took off running into Katherine’s house laughing all the way. They bolted upstairs took a look at the picture Stacy took and then looked out the window.

“Gunners still lying on the ground…” said Marissa.

“Oh no maybe we killed him” Stacy said with panic in her voice.

“Get your binoculars!” The girls took turns looking through the binoculars.

“He’s bleeding!” exclaimed Marissa. “What are we going to do…? We’re murderers! We‘re too young to be murderers!”

As the girl paced the room wondering just how they would ever live in a jail cell the rest of their lives outside the boys were trying to figure out just what to do.

“Is he dead?” one of the boys said

“I don’t know get a stick!!” exclaimed Matt. Then all of a sudden

“OOOHHHOOHH” came out of Gunner.

“He’s alive!!” They cried.

“Wha…What happened? Why am I bleeding?” Gunner said painfully.

“Those little brats clothes lined us! They are going to be in so much trouble! I’m scratched up pretty good and you were dead! I brought you back of course, being you best friend and all”. Matt said all in one breath.

“ I just want to go home and get cleaned up” said Gunner. The boys then left the scene. “Oh my god! He’s not dead!” The girls jumped for joy over the fact that they wouldn’t be going to prison. But with the consequences that occurred they then wish they had. About half an hour after the boys left the doorbell rang Marissa’s Dad and Stacy’s Mom showed up at Katherine’s. The girls got wide eyed.

“Oh no! Let’s go to the top of the stairs to listen” exclaimed Katherine.

“No I think they deserve to be punished” said Stacy’s Mom.

“I think it’s your daughters fault, she’s always scheming getting the other two in trouble, from now on I don’t want my daughter hanging around with your daughter” Stacy’s Mom raged.

“Now wait a minute, those girls are best friends, I can see separating them for a week but I think your being a little drastic Mrs. Wright. And furthermore don’t blame just my daughter they were all a part of it” said Mrs. Meek.

“ Your just so blind to the fact that your daughter is far from perfect and needs to be set straight, I’d send her to a boarding school if was my daughter” argued Mrs. Wright.

“Now ladies stop the blame game and lets figure out a punishment” said Mr. Melborn

“No…you know what you can have your wish Mrs. Wright you won’t see my daughter around your house again because I am forbidding her from entering that house of yours and playing with that daughter of yours. You know why your daughter is always here? Because we give her attention, you guys just brush her away and pay attention to that bully you call a son”

The girls listened to their parents fight when they heard enough they ran to Katherine’s room crying.

“Wow, this is bad” Marissa cried. The girls looked at one another.

“They aren’t tearing us apart, we have to run away” cried Katherine.

“ Where would we go” said Marissa.

“No, I’m not doing it, I’m in enough trouble I don’t need anymore” said Stacy. Stacy felt bad enough for what happened. Then they heard “Girls get down here NOW!”

The girls crept sheepishly don’t the stairs still crying.

“What were you thinking?” yelled Mrs. Wright.

“We just wanted them to stop bullying us, they are just so mean” cried Katherine.

“Look girls” said Mr. Melborn calmly “You really could’ve hurt them, you knocked Gunner out for god sakes. It‘s time to go home and face your punishments”.

The girls said their goodbyes. When Stacy tried to hug Katherine her mom pulled her out the door.

“Get in that car; I don’t want to hear a word from you”. Mrs. Wright yelled.

Mr. Melborn was worried about Stacy he knew she’d get it from her parents then again from her brother.

“Dad?” said Marissa “Is Stacy going to be alright? All she did was sit in the tree house it was me and Katherine that pulled the rope. We knew Stacy was the best to sit in the tree house because she gets bugged the most. But she told me that she didn‘t really want to do it because… well you know Stacy, she doesn‘t like to cause problems.”

“I don’t know Marissa; I really wish you would have talked to me about your bully problem instead of fixing it yourselves. Maybe when the dust settles things will go back to normal, it all depends. Mrs. Meek and Mrs. Wright need to sit and talk more calmly and work something out, I’m not sure if that’ll happen, only time will tell the outcome.” Mr. Melborn explained.

All Marissa could think of was her friends and just wished she did as her dad told her. He was a carpenter, a big burly man; he defiantly would have scared them.

“Oh no!” Marissa exclaimed

“What Marissa?” her dad asked

“..Oh… nothing” Marissa stammered. But Marissa remembered the trios hand prints; if they were torn apart then they wouldn’t be able to keep their vow to put their hand prints on the tree house wall year after year. Marissa started to cry again.

Stacy’s Mother scolded her all the way home. Telling her that she is no longer able to be friends with Katherine and to stay away from Marissa for one week. Stacy just stared out the car window and cried. When got home her Father and Brother were raging.

“You killed Gunner; I had to bring him back to life. Spank her ass Dad” Her brother chimed.

Her Father looked at his crying daughter. “What were you thinking? Go to your room I don’t want to see you the rest of the night”. He walked away in a huff.

“Your dead to me” Said her Brother.

Stacy ran upstairs and cried herself to sleep. After the prank the girls were not as close as before because Stacy was forbidden to hang around with Katherine and Katherine was forbidden to hang around Stacy. They figured that they would be able to hang out again once school started but Stacy’s brother put a stop to that. Anytime he’d see them together he’d go home and tell their parents and Stacy would get scolded every time. She just wished her brother would leave her alone. Gunner wouldn’t even speak to her. She found this a plus because that meant no tormenting. But when Gunner slept over Matt did enough for both boys. Stacy just wished that life would go back to the way it was before the prank. Marissa was torn between both friends. She wanted them all to be able to hang out freely not sneak around. School was hard just because of Stacy’s stupid brother. But the countdown was on because next year he’d be in a different school. They only had to do it for a year. He swears that he has spies but they don’t believe him.

“Hey Marissa, tell Stacy our “date” is coming up… you know April 5th” Katherine whispered. Marissa sat and thought April 5th.

“Oh we have to do out hand prints in the tree house, you’re right we can’t break the vow.” Whispered Marissa.
“Yeah we have two sets we can’t stop now. I got the paint ready, try to get Stacy to come over to your house and then you can sneak to my house.”

“Ok I will” whispered Marissa.


… Will this ever end

… Will this ever end

I sat in the kitchen
Listening to the radio
Quietly… impatiently
Hoping to hear good news
Knowing deep down I wouldn’t.
I heard about the on going war
The pain…the suffering
…Will this ever end?

Then the depression returned.
I began to fret
Again… about my son
The day he went to war,
When he looked me straight in the eye, and said,
“I’ll be fine mom, don’t worry about me.”
I knew by the look on his face
He was scared…and wondered
…Will this ever end?

Then, I imagined my son in the trenches
If only we could trade places for one day
The blood…the mud
I too could feel the doom and death
Everyday I would
Hope and pray that I’d return… to my family
…Will this ever end?

Suddenly, I tuned into the radio
It blared, “The war is finally over!”
Waiting… four months
My son has not returned
Yes, the war has ended
And so has a part of me
Still, everyday I hear…”don’t worry about me”
…Will this ever end?

Day To Day Life

Every morning is the same routine.  Get the kids off to school followed by dogs going out to do their morning duty followed by feeding the farm animals.  Goats are very much routine oriented animals and if you slip in any way on that routine… you know!  They will “maaam” to no end until you smarten up.


On the weekends the kids help with the animals.  When I say help, they play with the animals.  Kalie likes taking care of the chickens.  She likes to cuddle the chickens but the goats want to play so Snowflake will give her a light head butt as if to say, “Um excuse me! I’m here too!”  Kalie isn’t too fond of the head butt.  Warren just likes to play in the pen and get the animals riled up.

We live on a side road which is where we often go for walks or Warren on his bike and Kalie on her scooter.  It’s such a small community and people will stop their car to talk whether they know you or not.  Which is nice. Plus it’s a beautiful time of year to take in the color and see what was hiding among the leaves.

Once the frost warnings started I dug up my geranium and potato vine plants, put them in pots to grow in the house for the winter.  So far they are happy with my decision.  They will not with stand the cold temperatures, it would be a shame to let them wilt and die.


Since we had lost a couple of layers from predators I got three more layers.  These road island reds are named Starlight, Marybell and Haley.  They stick together and have befriended Big Moe, Martha and Barbra.  They definately aren’t very fond of Big Curly, he’s a bit more agressive then Big Moe.  He does his rooster dance around the ladies, and he thinks he’s pretty hot stuff.  I think the ladies would beg to differ.

It’s such a beautiful time of year.  I was going to the feed store the other morning and the cold air with the warmer water made for a mysterious misty picture.  I couldn’t help myself, I had to pull over and take a picture.


I decided to get another job, two to three shifts a week, just for something to do. Get me out of the house to socialize with people other then farm animals.  So I’ll be working at the local coffee shop.  It’s five minutes from home, can work around my husband and kids schedule so it will work out pretty good.  Plus it will keep me from going stir crazy this winter.   Which if I don’t do something… I just might.

The Helping Hand

We all need that helping hand from time to time.  Life has a way of challenging you when you least expect it.  To which you must say, “bring it on”.

I’ve had a lot of ups and downs in my life and the only way I got through them was thinking of how much worse it could be.  In turn the situation seemed to be a bit more bareable.  Some situations are uncontrollable but one must sit down and think why they are happening.  Then may have to seek that helping hand.

The helping hand is there when you need it.  We  all know the person or persons we can fall back on to help guide use through the tough times.  This is usually one maybe two or three people.

I tend to be a bit of a hermit.  Meaning I keep to myself, I don’t socialize much and am most happy at home puttering around outside.  But as I get older I realize that others have so much to offer and as the old saying goes, “many hands make light work.”  So if many hands make light work then coming together as a community will can help each other maybe more so than those one, two or three hands could.  Because those hands may not be able to offer to you what you really need.

We all have our own dreams and goals.  Mine is to be able to rely more on my own land then a store.  But I believe that more people could reach their dreams and goals if they went through life helping others reach their dreams and goals.  For if everyone has a piece of pie but all do not put their piece back you will never have a full pie.



Once a year we take a day to give thanks.  Thanks for family, friends, good health, clothes on back, a roof over head and so on and so forth.  These for sure are proper things to be thankful for.

But we must think of the ones that for one reason or another can not be thankful for any or all of the above.  The ones that can only dream, hope and or wish for whatever they are lacking within  their lives.

Instead of taking one day to be thankful take everyday to be thankful for you never know what each day will bring.

Enjoy the time spent with family and friends.  Ask your children what they are thankful for.

I asked my children and they said “nothing”.  I went through the different things they have that others do not and it made Kalie sad.  Sad for others that don’t have what we have.  Warren started joining in on things to be thankful for, once he understood what I meant.

We by no means live an extravagant life.  We have what we need to live day to day.  To which we are thankful for.

This may not be a long post but I hope it is a meaningful one.  As you wake up every morning remember the light of the day unwraps the darkness of night and presents you with a gift as you open your eyes.



Wrangling Pigs

Throughout the day when I’m not out with the animals puttering around I’m looking out the patio door to check that all is well.  Normally I look out and see the chickens and goats basking in the sun or nibbling and pecking at this or that.  I look out yesterday and see two bald boars bounding around the pen, reaking havoc within the corral.  Running and bouncing curiously looking at different things and mowing down everything else.

Luckily for me my husband was still home.  We go out for a good ole fashion pig wrangle.  My husband grabbed a bucket of food and I was already in the corral thinking good Lord how are we going to get these big buggers back in their pen.  Also knowing this is my fault because I fed them last and forgot to nail the door shut.

So out comes my husband with the bucket of food, takes it in their pen and Rocky took the bait, in he went.  Rooter is much more head strong than Rocky… he wasn’t taking the bait.  So now one’s in and one’s out.  I have to hold the door closed so Rocky stays in while my husband wrangles Rooter.  After a bit of time and a fight Rooter was back in his pen.  But Rooter is quite a big pig and had over done himself with his stubbornness.  He ended up vomiting and panting uncontrollably.  We hosed him down to cool him off.  This helped a bit but he was beyond being tuckered out. So I hosed him down a couple more times and within a couple hours, after he had a nap he was back to his pushy self again.

Meanwhile while Rooter was distraught Rocky is wagging his nubby tail happily smacking away at the food he got for being a good pig.  He’d check on Rooter, nudge him with his nose, oink and go back to his food.  Rooter is the dominate one so he normally pushes his weight when it comes to the food.  Rocky thoroughly enjoyed his meal, solo.

Later that night I went to lock everything up.  As per usual the goats are standing on the chicken coop waiting for me to come lock them into their room for the night.  At this time of day they will not do their loud “mam” but they whisper their “mam” as I’m walking towards them.

Big Curly has proven to Big Moe that he is and always will be the more dominate rooster. So they’ve separated their sleeping quarters.  Moe sleeps in the goat pen with Martha and Barbra with Curly sleeps in the chicken coop with the rest of the ladies.

I get the goats and chickens all secured for the night and do my rounds looking for chickens.  As I do I check in at the pigs whom normally jump up with a snort.  But they were laying side by side sound asleep.  Tuckered out from their days events.


Changing Season

Trees dawn their glowing gown,

One by one whirling down,

upon the autumns cooling ground.


The wind whispers in my ears,

through leaves that winter’s near,

frost creeps on leaves, no fear.


Snow begins to fall so light,

The air begins to give a bite,

until it blows with all it’s might.


The cold creeps up beginning to nibble,

blowing as if it’s playing a fiddle,

breaking you down whittle by whittle.


Stronger than wind and cold is might,

for if it wants can bite and bite,

but cozy are we by fire light.


Fall Beauty

Fall is upon us.  The leaves are changing, the nights are starting to get crisp and cool.  The air has a cool breeze that blows through the warm sunshine.



Our garden is done for the year and ready for the winter months ahead.  The bulbs that can’t withstand the cold temperatures are out of their soil home and drying for safe keeping.  The rest are wilting and going into their winter hibernation.


This time of year saddens me with all the vibrant flower colour now gone for the year and the inability of going to the garden to grab a hand full of beans or peas or whatever may strike my fancy.

At the same time it excites me with the beautiful leaves showing their true colour underneath their summer greenery.  The gardens all prepped for next year and planning has begun, which I look forward to.

The meat kings are growing nicely and are full feathered.  Two of the three laying hens lay an egg per day insisting on laying them in the goats hay trough.  We have three more lay hens ordered where we lost two and want to be able to keep our home stocked with our own eggs for baking and cooking.


The girls are getting frisky with the cooler temperatures they play and frolic in their corral.  Or happily lay down chewing away in the sunshine.

The pigs are big and bold, loving feeding time and cleaning time wiggling their little tails whenever they see food coming their way or have our company in their pen.


Now comes the time to start winterizing the pens and stocking up on hay.  Hay is a hot commodity this year as the prices have increased with stocks low where it was a dry, hot summer most farmers only got one cut off their fields.

Soon the snow will be flying and there won’t only be manure to shovel but snow too.  So even though the summer cores are coming to an end the winter cores are soon beginning.


A Day in the life of a retired man- The Doctor

The misses told me she made me a doctors appointment.
I asked her, “What the hell for?  I’m fine!”
“You’re cholesterol is still up and it’s time for your prostate exam, you need to get checked out.”
“I’m NOT letting that doctor stick his finger up my arse and feel my anus nuggets!  Do you not remember what happened last time?  Just as he entered the cavern the one man band got scared and tried to blow the foreign objects out!”
That faithful day came that I had to go.  I sat in the waiting room full of people with a scowl on my face.  Then I got an idea.  If I have to have fingers shoved up my arse I mays well make it worth while to be here.
After a two hour wait they finally called my name.  The nurse got me to put on a Johnny shirt and I waited another half an hour in the office then the doctor finally showed his face.
He sat down and looked at my chart and saw what was on the agenda for today.
“Oh wonderful.” he mumbled, then looked up as if he didn’t mean to say that out loud.
“Well lets get this process started.” he said snapping his gloves on.
I bent over clenching my cheeks for all they were worth.
“Please relax.”
“I can’t bloody well relax!”
“Well the quicker you relax the quicker this is done.”
So I relax… Your funeral I thought.
Yet again as soon as the rubber met the road the one man band panicked and threw a stink bomb out.
“Told you that I couldn’t relax.”
The doctor continued on coughing as he went.
“Everything feels fine sir.” He said.  “But your cholesterol is still high so I’m going to change your dose on your pills.  You can get you prescription out from the nurse.” And he  started to walk away.
“Hold on there Doc… I’m not done!  I want some Viagra.”
“Yes,  I want Little Richie to be Fat Alberta for a night!”
The doctor gave me a strange look.  I just sat up straighter.  He went over my health records.
“Well I don’t see anything in your records that shows you can’t have it.  You’re heart seems fairly healthy.  I’ll put that prescription with the other one.”
I got dressed smiling from ear to ear.  Went and scooped up my prescriptions and away I went.
I put my prescriptions into the pharmacy and went merrily shopping at Walmart.  Yes merrily because I was going to go buy some new underwear while I waited.
I find the underwear section and got hunting for the perfect pair.  I want something sexy I thought.
“Oh what do my eyes see?” I mumbled.  I spotted a leopard print thong.  Perfect.
I went to go pay.  I proudly set them down on the conveyor belt.  The cashier smirked and gave me a weird look.
“What? You’ve never seen an old guy in a thong before?”
“No and I don’t particularly want to.” she replied.
I paid and grabbed my purchase, stuck up my nose and stomped to the pharmacy to get my magic pills.
Once I get home the misses is asking me all about my appointment.
“I told her what happened with the exam.”  She thought it was funny, of all the nerve.
Night fall came and she was in her flannel nighty, reading  a book in bed.  I have a shower, put on some after shave, put on my new thong and take my magic pill.
I come bounding out of the bathroom and stop in a super hero stance.  The misses looked over her glasses at me and asked, “What are you doing?”
“Do you like?  I bought a thong today.”  Pride foaming from me doing a little circle stopping to shake my buns.
“That’s lovely honey but your California Raisins are supposed to be inside the thong.”
I look down to see them swaying like a pendulum just above my knees.  I tried to tuck them back in but they just kept falling out.  I gave up and strut over to the bed.
“What got into you?” She asked.
“I got me some Viagra today.” As those words came out I stubbed my toe on the edge of the bed.  I go down to grab my toe, the pendulum just a swinging, and bang my head on the bed post and fall forward.  I lay there knocked out with my kick stand erect underneath me.  The next thing I remember is being on my back and someone tapping me on the face. “Sir, wake up, sir?”
My eyes open up and I see a foreign face looking at me.  I look down at my crotch.
“Oh my God! Viagra makes you grow two penises!”
“No sir you probably have a bit of double vision.  You hit pretty hard.  We’re going to take you to the hospital and monitor you over night.”
I close my eyes tight a few times to focus.  I then realize the situation that I’m in.
“Why didn’t you put some clothes on me!” I say to the misses. I look down and the raisins are draped over my leg.
“I wasn’t worried about that.”  She says.
They wrap me up and take me to the hospital, me grumbling all the way.
I get to the hospital, the misses puts a bag in a locker for me and says goodnight and goes home.
I get up and go to the locker to get some real clothes and get out of this damn Johnny shirt.
I’m so glad to at least have a private room.
I open the locker and grab my bag.  Then I hear. “Nice thong.”
I grab the back of my Johnny shirt and whip around.
“I thought this was a God damn private room.”
“Not quite Sir a lady in her 40’s replies.”
I go into the bathroom and get changed.  When I come out I don’t even look at the lady.  I bee line it straight for the bed.  There I have a not so peaceful sleep.

Day in the life of a retired man- Freedom or…

The sun wraps around to the window.  My eyes flutter opened.  I smile as I have big plans for the day.  I slowly get out of bed trying not to wake up the misses at the same time trying to contain my one man band to a near silent rhythm.
I go and put on some socks and sneakers and my robe and head out for a nice walk in the woods.  Once I’m far enough in so nobody can see me I take off my robe, hang it off a tree branch to grab on the way back and decide that I am going to be one with nature. Now strutting through the woods with just socks and sneakers.  Breathing in the crisp morning air, listening to the birds, oh this is wonderful I think to myself.
All of a sudden I take a cramp in my guts.  Oh no… I have to poop!  I walk around looking for a good place to go just like a dog trying to find that perfect spot.  I find a mossy patch, grab ahold of a tree branch and let’er fly.  I start feeling much better then hear a branch crack.  It was too late when I realized it was the one I was holding onto.  It snapped and I flew backwards… right into my steaming pile.  I cursed as I got up.  Being in these wood many times over the years I knew there was a little brook close by.  I’m going to have to go in and clean up, I thought.  Oh this is going to be cold!
I get to the brook and decide to go in sneaker, socks and all.  I get in to my knees and am trying to wash up when I hear from behind me.
“Sir? Is everything all right?”
I crouch my wrinkled ass down into the water and slowly look around to see a fisherman standing there.  With the force of me crouching my body down my one man band took a big breath and let it out as my ass hit the water forcing a big bubble to roll up.  As I’m crouched I feel something latch onto the head of Little Richie.  I jump up, my arms fly up and finger spread, I’m now into a full flee out of the water.  I get to the bank and am trying to get up as fast as I can but my feet keep slipping in the mud.  I look like a god damn mountain goat trying to get up a slippery mountain.  I then see a hand out in front of me so I grab it and get up on solid ground.  Now dripping wet, naked with a leach hanging off Little Richie, standing in front of the fisherman.
“Are you alright?” he asked.
I instantly put my hands on my hips and snap, “of course I’m alright!”
“Would you like some salt to shrink that little this thing?” He said as he pointed towards my crouch
With hands still on the hips, “I’ll have you know it’s normally called Fat Albert but the cold water shrunk it… Thank you very much!”
“Sir… I was talking about the leach.”
“Oh.. well in that case, yes.”
He got out some salt and I start garnishing my willie.  Finally the leach dried up and fell off.
“Would you like me to help you get home Sir?”
“NO! I can get myself home! Thank you for your help.”
I strutted away with just my socks and sneakers, my pride deflated and went to look for my robe.
I see it still hanging off a branch and walk back to the house.
I quietly enter the back door and sneak in.  As I turn around there is the warden standing looking at me.
“What happened to you!”
“Nothing!” I reply, embarrassed.
“Why are you naked?”
I went for a refreshing walk in the woods!”
“Why are your shoes wet?”
“I had to wash my ass in the brook!”
“Why did you have to wash your ass in the brook?”
“Because you feed me too much “healthy food” and I took a cramp and had to go!”
“That still doesn’t explain why you had to go in the brook.”
“I grabbed a branch and it broke so I fell in my pile, OK!”
I took off my robe to go change.
“What happened to Little Richie?  Why is he all purple?”
“A leach latched on when I squatted in the water to hide from the fisherman!”
“Someone saw you naked! That leach will never be the same… neither will the fisherman!”
I stomped my wrinkled ass up stairs to go change, hearing giggles behind me.  Never will I do that again!